Certainly, there's plenty to do. The wicked never rest and so her days are filled with following the miserable trails that the slaver ships leave behind. This time, she stalks two across the open ocean; The Ribald and Snake Eyes. Neither make it to their ports with their crew intact. She spends the rest of the time between looking for lost families, restoring children and teens to their homes or at the very least, someplace they can start over.
A few of the truly lost end up staying with her for the journey back to Ketterdam, intent on starting over. She makes them no promises, because even with Kaz's leverage—which she intends to use—the Barrel is not a place of safety. Inej looks at each of them hard in the eye as she gives them these facts, the way so many can end up with a slit throat in a gutter, and each of her five orphans stare back with their chins up.
They'll make it, she thinks.
When her ship finally docks, she can feel tension starting to slough off, as if the ocean is a heavy cloak she wears. Someone has to do her work, but she's beginning to understand how royalty could feel, how the weight of a crown bears down. She places Specht in charge and has Kumir—a recent addition—oversee the orphans and making sure they get a good start. Later, she'll make sure they're specifically placed.
But for now, she has someone to see. It only takes her a few minutes to get her land legs back and once she does, she doesn't waste time with the streets. The rooftops are freedom here, above all the muck of the streets, away from prying hands and peering eyes. Her feet remember the path to the Slat with ease and soon enough, she's picking the lock to a particular attic window, ducking in and dropping from the sill. ]
[ life has, in all the ways it does, found its routine.
kaz has the slay to oversee, the dregs to watch over. stock and leverage and pieces of the city either fall in or out of place and he is there to correct them. it’s not a matter of if the other gangs will start acting up, but when. how. and how can he get ahead of them. because that’s what it comes down to at the end of the day - staying ahead. always ahead. and it happens to be what he’s best at.
the dregs are doing well, the crow club is doing well. he lies awake at night thinking not about what he needs to do but what he needs to keep in place. it’s a change from the life he’s grown used to, surviving in the barrel, but it’s a life he can get used to. has.
when the city already assumes you’re a monster, you don’t need to spend your time doing every monstrous thing.
and kaz’s reputation - the dregs’ reputation - has reached all walks of the city. it hasn’t made life easy, per day, but easier. different. less unwieldy.
he loses track of how long it’s been since inej’s ship had last found its way to third harbor, the last time he had a new collection of upstarts to place, to watch over, to be responsible for. he knows inej doesn’t expect him to give them the city, but he can’t help but push them along. provide protection, when he can. push a few favors, if he must. he has the clout and power to use, and if they are one of the few connections to inej he has while she’s off at sea, well. he’ll take them.
it’s late in the day by the time kaz brekker turns in, thinking of a bath and his bed as he starts up the stairs. and that is still what’s on his mind when he slides his key in the lock - because while his office may be downstairs, now, he would never give up this attic space, the window ledge, the view. he doesn’t work up here like he used to, maybe, but this space is still his. even if someone else is inside by the time the key turns and the door swings open. even if there is another body in the room when he steps inside, closes the door behind him, and turns back to the room.
inej was always the only one he couldn’t sense. couldn’t hear. couldn’t know was coming from a mile away. ]
[ It’s good timing, she thinks. Because soon enough, she’s hearing the tap of Kaz’s cane on the stairs, that particular cadence of his walk. Being in charge of the Slat, he could have moved down to the first floor, could’ve made it the shortest walk from the door to his room.
But she knows he won’t. The attic is his space, the furthest point away from the noise and crowd of the first floor. Here, there aren’t too many bodies in close quarters. Nowadays, it’s only him without her ghosting his steps.
For a short while, she’ll do that again, this time because she misses it. Misses the way they move around each other in an easy flow, a current that seems like they’ve known the other longer than they have. Most of all, though, she just misses him.
He doesn’t immediately notice her when he steps in, his expression filled with pre-occupation. It’s not a scheme, that much she can tell, but there’s a plan. Something he’s considering; it’s in the divot between his brows. ]
I see I beat your runner here. [ Of course she did, the rooftops have always been the fastest route back. ]
[ he notices the second she speaks - another space, a body, her. it’s barely a moment’s pause, but he’s sure she notices, the half second of tension before the release.
inej is the only other person who could come looking for him here, the only person who would be able to get in. a part of him is proud for what he was able to teach her, but a larger, louder part knows it’s just her. given the time and the determination, inej could get anything she wanted.
the door closes behind him with a solid, definitely click and kaz looks up, seeing inej perched across the room, and actually allows himself a smile. small, perhaps a bit weighted, but genuine. rare. the kind of smile he reserves for inej and inej alone. ]
Good to know the sea hasn’t slowed you down.
[ he’ll ask after his runner, later. how much slower they were. if they’d be doing their job. for now, every inch of kaz screams at inej’s very presence in the room. the fact that she’s here at all, but here looking like that. kaz meets her eyes but then let’s himself look at the rest of her - taking only a second, but enough time to notice the differences. the new clothes, the length of her hair, any visible scars. it’s still inej - stunning, beautiful, maddening inej - but he checks in all the same.
only after that is done does he continue into the room. does he step closer to her, but towards his desk, setting the cane to lean against it and to reach for his gloves. comfortable, familiar, still part of his routine - almost in spite of the way every single nerve of his screams about inej’s presence, that she’s here. finally here. back again. ]
And that you haven’t forgotten your way to the slat.
[ His shoulders tense and she waits it out, feels relieved when she sees the line of them level out again. She stays where she is, makes him come to her, to close the distance between them. After all, she’s sailed hundred of miles to be here, he can walk a few feet in his room.
Kaz doesn’t disappoint, his gaze first sweeping over her as eagerly as hers does to him. Cataloguing the changes, how she’s pretty sure that’s a new jacket, a little gauntness to his face that says he hasn’t been sleeping well lately. Inej wants nothing more than to put a hand on his cheek and tell him to rest, but she can be patient. ]
Specht complains I spend too much time in the ropes. [ So no, her climbing hasn’t had a chance to rust. It’s a thrill, to balance along the mast beams and watch the sea whip by; perhaps too much of one for her trusty first mate, who always looks a little green around the gills by the time she climbs back down. ]
You’d have to move the entire building before I forget.
[ he can tell, after a moment, what it is she expects from him. the silent way she settles in her spot by the window, the way her eyes run over him - a mirrored image of his own. inej is waiting for him to come to her, and he assumes she probably deserves as much.
even still, kaz takes his time. he peels the gloves off easily, slipping them over his hands and laying the across the top of the desk. then comes his jacket, sliding down off his shoulders easily.
this isn't the first time inej has watched kaz strip down in his office, and he doesn't suppose it will be the last either.
still, as he sets the coat down on the desk, he finally turns to face her, taking slow steps towards her as he works the buttons of his sleeves undone. he came up to his room to get comfortable, after all. why keep on his armor? ]
And I expect you'd find me even then. [ he says it with a sly smile, knowing and joking and carefully crafted all at once. because while he's gotten better at letting himself simply be seen by inej, he is still kaz brekker, all carefully crafted walls and all.
by the time he's reached her, his sleeves have been rolled up to his elbows, his dark woven vest still buttoned and his dark tie still tied. and with a few more steps, he makes it to her, setting his hands on the windowsill on either side of her. ]
[ These movements are as familiar to her as her own, the way he slips his gloves off and shrugs off the jacket. Over the years, she’s seen him do this hundreds of times, though only more recently has she felt differently in watching. At first, she’d been shocked and embarrassed, thinking he’d been trying to flirt. It hadn’t taken her long to realize he just simply had no modesty and wiping down with her in the room was considered efficient.
Trust Kaz to boil undressing down to efficiency.
Now there’s definitely an undertone, a tension that layers between them as he carefully rolls up his sleeves and effectively corners her against the sill. She tilts her chin up to meet his gaze, a smile barely curving her mouth up. Reaching up, she gently musses his slicked back hair, smile widening when it starts to fall across his forehead. The lack of severity takes years off his face and she likes how it’s borderline rakish. ]
[ he holds her eyes. she smiles, runs her hands through his hair, and kaz has to handle the fact that she is so beautiful and has come back, once again, to see him. he doesn't react, lets her fingers run over his scalp, and kaz lets her. lets his eyes fall closed for just a moment as he revels in her. her being close enough to smell, her being close enough to feel.
when she speaks, kaz opens his eyes to see her again, hungry. bright. physically there and not just another ones of his dreams. ]
Do you want something more? Name your price.
[ kaz wants to be closer. wants to touch her. wants to feel her. but he won't let himself be weak enough to act on that mere moments after she's arrived back in the slat. so instead he lifts his brows, looks up to meet her eyes, waiting for her answer.
name your price. because he'll pay it. anything for her. ]
[ He doesn’t flinch, doesn’t move a muscle, and Inej feels some tension loosen in her chest. They’ve come a long way, but there’s always a possibility his past can get dredged up. Just as much as hers sometimes nips at her heels when she least expects it to.
Those moments are fewer and farther between, but they’re still there.
Just, perhaps, not right now. Not with how he’s looking at her with that darkened gaze, the brown of his eyes warm. It’s a look only she’s privy to and it buoys her whole mood. ]
I’ll take a kiss to start. [ There’s a simmer of promise of something more, underneath that. She slides a hand to his tie, as if tugging him down to meet her. And maybe it doubles as a motion to loosen it, to see him further relaxed. ]
[ kaz lets a grin slip by, at that. inej, who appears to be content with him there. inej, who searches his face and doesn't look away. kaz wants to kiss her, of course he does, but hearing her ask for it sends a different kind of thrill up his back. ]
A modest price. [ because he sees the promise of something more, under her words. the promise of something else that neither he nor she would admit to wanting.
he wants her, but that's no surprise to either of them, considering the changes he's made. the price he's paid to be here. no longer does his skin crawl, feeling her fingers slide over his scalp. no tension in his frame - if anything, less tension that before - the closer she comes to him. he's worked hard and continued to work hard to get here, but even through it all, inej is really the only exception.
kaz grins at her, then leans in to close the distance, kissing her at first with very little expectation behind it. soft, modest you might say, in how their lips brush together. but even still, he feels like a piece of himself settles back into place, knowing it's her. knowing that she's here.
his hands don't lift from the windowsill as they kiss. and when he pulls away, it's with a quick intake of breath. because she's always been the only one who could steal anything from kaz. anything at all. ] To start.
[ She knows he catches her drift; they’ve been in step for what feels like forever. In many ways, they’ve mastered the art of reading the other person, no words necessary.
Not that she’ll say no if he decides to give any of those particular feelings a voice. He has, here and there, each admittance a gift from someone like Kaz Brekker, who has been so buttoned up for the entire time she’s known him. The Barrel isn’t a kind place, it’s difficult to shed habits which expose their soft sides.
Here though, she can revel in the actionable. How he leans in without hesitation, mouth pressing gently to hers, just barely a brush. Her heartbeat ticks up a notch, the flutter that insists on more. Inej meets the kiss, leans in a bit, fingers curling tighter on his tie, something to ground her. When he pulls away, she lets him with a tinge of regret. ]
Passable. [ She teases, though she wedges a finger into the loop of his tie, pulling carefully to unravel it. The cloth slides down itself, leaving it hanging– only his collar holding it in place. ] Aren’t you going to relax?
[ he turns down his eyes briefly to watch her pull loose his tie, letting the fabric hang loose around his neck. when he looks back to her with one dark brow arched, it's with a kind of competitive air. ]
I am relaxed. [ kaz counters, letting his eyes drift down inej's neck, to the collar of her shirt. because in most ways that people know him, he is. his jacket is tossed unceremoniously, his gloves left behind. with his tie undone, it's the least amount of clothing most have ever seen him stripped down to, short those of the crew he'd taken to the ice court a few years prior. but that's the point, isn't it? that inej is the only one who can take off his layers, one piece at a time.
he wants her, and it's a feeling he's become more comfortable with over the years. the yearning, the ache, the distinct force that pulls him towards inej even before he was at a place where he could do this. this, in this instance, being kaz as he leans forward just a bit more, pressing a kiss to the skin under inej's ear, and then her neck. just as soft, just as feather-light, easing into this despite how much his body screams at him to move. ]
[ Honestly, frustratingly, he has a point. Kaz with his jacket off and sleeves rolled up may as well count as being in pajamas for how casual it counts for him. Still, she knows she can divest him of more, wants to peel off the layers as much as she wants him to the same to her.
Three months felt too long, so many of those nights ending up with her turning over for someone who wasn't there. It's manifested as a physical ache, especially now that they're so close together. She leans into the soft kiss, tilts her head just a bit to the side so the angle is easier. Blindly, she feels out the buttons on his vest and undoes them, grabbing ahold of the two sides and tugging him closer. ]
[ she responds to him in a way that drives him mad, and he revels in it. in the slow arch of her body under him, even without them touching. the way she leans towards him, tilts her head. he kisses once more, then a second, before pulling back just enough to huff a quiet laugh across her neck. in the space he'd just kissed.
inej reaches up and deftly undoes each of his buttons, gripping the fabric of his vest and pulling him closer. he lets her, kaz will always let her now that they've come this far, and he lifts one of his hands from the sill to press across the flat of her back. ]
Wound up from what? [ the question is half curiosity (if she really did run into any trouble on her journeys) and half keeping up the pretense of conversation. of making it seem that he's not just some animal, ready to jump inej the second he's close enough to feel her (no matter how much truth that may hold). with a small step, he settles up against her, both of his hands moving to work at the ties at her back, undressing her with thin, thieves fingers, quick and efficient in their use.
kaz leans back though not away from her, just enough to catch her eyes - confirming her intent, but also showing his own, before he leans and catches her lips again, this kiss much more firm than the one before. more hungry, more desperate, bits and pieces of himself peeking out from the layers he closes himself in during their time apart. ]
[ The soft huff against her neck tickles and she smiles, always glad to note when he shows his happiness, no matter how small. It's a happiness that's been hard won and she intends on fanning that flame for as long as she can. The Kaz of now is such a far cry from when they'd first met, misery and distance clinging to him like a second skin.
He's neither of those things currently, especially not with how he puts a warm and possessive hand on her back. ]
Long journey. [ She starts, simple enough, while she lets him undo the more complicated laces on her vest. His weight carefully balances against her and she feels a familiar urge to push him onto the bed. ] I had too much time to think about you these last few weeks.
[ After she and Specht agreed it was about time to head towards Kerch. They'd been getting low on supplies and had gained more than a few more mouths to feed. Now that she's here, all those lonely days are floating to the surface. She shrugs off the vest and meets his gaze, her own desire a mirror to his. They're both holding back, just enough. It won't hold for much longer, she thinks, as she returns the kiss, both of her hands dragging down his front. ]
Idle minds... [ there's some kind of proverb in that. some saying from some person about how dangerous it is to have too much time to think. kaz isn't sure if he believes in it or not, but it's a quick comment to make before he presses in for the kiss. and maybe he's alluding to how dangerous it is to think about him for too long. how dangerous this could be.
but whatever meaning might be under those words is lost the second he is kissing her again, his fingers working off the laces on the back of her vest and pulling loose the tunic and undershirt. just enough that his fingers can slide across the skin at her lower back - possessive, hungry, desperate all over again. the feeling of her skin against his own is electric, a heat moving up his arms and into his chest, and it has him leaning into her more fully as he pulls her body tighter to his own.
his resistance is crumbling, he can feel it falling away like melting ice, but the bed is across the room and that - at this moment - is just too far away. so instead he simply presses more tightly against her, rolling his hips to hers. ]
[ An idle mind certainly hadn't helped her over the course of the last few weeks. The want had just grown stronger with each day, so perhaps it was a dangerous thing. It made her miss him too much.
Certainly, it has her soaking up the attention when he kisses her again, his hands pulling her shirt out from where it's been tucked and skimming his fingers across her skin. A noise of appreciation is muffled against his mouth and when he finally rolls his hips to hers, there's a low throbbing heat in her stomach.
Her own fingers slide to find the buttons on his shirt, undoing them and eagerly yanking the cloth up, one palm laying flat on his chest. She pulls away from the kiss long enough to give him a gentle nudge with said hand. ]
Bed, now. [ Her patience has frayed; no longer interested in pretending she can wait. ]
[ he drinks in the noise when she makes it, breathing in the sounds of her wanting him. it’s impossible, thinking that it might be true, but equally impossible imagining a life without it. he slides his hands across the expanse of skin he can reach and all he wants is more. more of her, more of this. kaz can’t focus too much on how long it’s been since he’s last seen her, or how many nights he lay awake with only thoughts of her.
she pushes him away and he tugs on her lips when they separate, not quite ready to lose this touch. to let this stop. her palm is flat against his chest and she can probably feel the speed his heart is moving, the erratic thumping against his ribcage.
bed, now she says, and there’s a fire under his skin. an electric current that courses out to every inch of him. he leans back, ignoring how the shifting weight makes his leg ache, and let’s out a breath - a sigh, not of relief but of acceptance. ]
You’ve grown impatient. [ it’s teasing, of course, his voice a low gravel as he slides his open vest and shirt off his shoulders and let’s them crumple to the floor, before reaching back towards her to grab at her waist, pulling her away from the windowsill and with him across the room. ]
[ His touch feels so good, so welcome after too long. It's not enough to have it against that portion of her back, so when he obliges her and steps towards the bed, she happily goes with him. It's even better now that he's shed his shirt and vest and she unabashedly takes in the sight, eyes following the sinuous line of his back. ]
My hand and a pillow are poor replacements. [ Yes that means exactly what you think, Kaz. She only pauses her steps to pull her top off, dropping the garment on the floor to join his. A flick of her wrist and the binder she wears is undone, falling to her feet and leaving her just as bare as he is on top. Once she kicks her shoes off, she sidles in closer again, smoothing her hands down his sides greedily. Leaning up, she kisses his neck briefly, pulling away with a scrape of teeth. ]
If you say you aren't just the same, I'm calling you a liar.
[ not that is an image that kaz will return to at a later date. when the months get longer and this new version of himself, the one that doesn't grow ill at the mere thought of another person's skin, needs something to replace the lack of her beside him. he moves towards the bed and turns when he reaches it, grinning as he falls to sit on its edge. ]
But I am a liar. And a thief. [ kaz's brow arches, still a bit playful in his good mood, as he reaches and pulls her closer to him, between his knees. he let's himself have another moment to take her in, the naked expanse of her before him, the soft warmth of her skin under his hands. there's still an inch to the back of his brain, then, a curling of emotion - but that is now want, hunger, desire. not the nauseating mixture of self-disgust he carried with him for years.
he presses a kiss to her collar bone, then another below, his hands running up her thighs. ] What did you think about, with your hand and a pillow? [ he looks up at her through dark lashes, setting another kiss below her collarbone and above her heart, then a third further down her chest. ]
No excuses. [ Besides, she would much rather the thief than the liar right now, especially if he'll be stealing her away. Or at least putting those quick fingers of his to more use than ties on a vest.
With that in mind, she steps between his legs without a second thought, liking the change of height. It's easier to study his face like this, catalogue the difference in the arch of his brow, how his eyes have gone dark—but not bitter. She makes a pleased little noise when he slides his hands up her legs, a shiver running its way up her spine.
Combing her fingers through his hair, she gently scratches down the back of his neck, nails pressing in just enough to leave quick fading depressions as she gets to his shoulders. Later, she thinks she'll leave a mark, something only she'll see. ]
I wanted to sit across your hips and have you take me. Or to wake you with my hand around your cock. [ That was the least of it. Her expression softens and she traces a finger along his collarbone. ] Mostly, how much I wanted to hold you.
[ his fingers skitter across her thighs, as if a promise of things to come. of what things could come, depending on the night. her fingers thread back through his hair and scratch across the back of his neck and he lets out a breath, tightening his grip on her. as if to make sure to keep her here.
kaz wants her to mark him, but that isn't abnormal. especially with her schedule, he likes the reminders she did come back - whether for him, or the city, or anything else. ]
That could be arranged. [ a smirk, a look up through his eyelashes. catching his eyes, before kissing her chest again, and then down again, before wrapping around his mouth around the peak of her breast. ]
[ Before they'd worked through more of their past hurdles, she didn't like being pulled in so tightly. Didn't like the feeling of fingers grabbing at her body, too reminded of greedy men's hands from the Menagerie.
Now though, she feels nothing but a thrill when Kaz's fingers tighten on her thighs. It's not enough to bruise, not yet, but the pressure is welcome. She's about to ask him to move them higher, to the vee of her legs, panties starting to go damp from so little touch after so long. He ducks his head though, all mischief when his mouth closes on her chest, and she forgets any words she'd been about to say. ]
Good boy. [ Is what comes out instead, syllables mixed in with a gasp. One hand settles at the back of his neck, as if to keep him there. The other drops down, nails gently scraping down his chest. ]
[ if this were before, there would have been miles and miles to wade through. kaz would never have allowed himself to get to this point, to allow himself to feel this much, and definitely not in a way he could show to inej. and that wasn't even taking into account where the gloves lay on the other side of the room, in how easy it feels to just be hear her, skin on skin.
before, there would have been nothing kaz could have given her in this moment. simply being near her had driven him insane, and now he honestly, truly, can't get enough of her.
he swirls his tongue around her, kissing and sucking at the peak he has in his mouth. at the good boy, kaz actually feels something like electricity shoot down his spine, just enough to have him dig his nails into the skin of her thigh. not too hard, not enough to mark, but to show intent. intent for something more. ]
[ Sometimes, she wants to curse him for his mouth. He'd been quick to pick up how she liked to be touched, where she wanted to be kissed, and had applied his silver tongue or lockpick hands to the cause. Right now is no different, the heat of his mouth sending a warm throb through her whole body.
While enjoyable, it's not strictly fair. She wants more and she thinks the grip on her thighs tells the same story. The hand on his chest pushes again this time, aiming to get him back on the bed. She'll follow him onto it after she undoes her pants and pulls them down, haphazardly kicking them onto the floor. Clad only in her underwear, she settles across his lap, letting her warmth bleed through his trousers.
Leaning forward, she presses an affectionate kiss to his cheek. ]
Moving too slow. [ She says as she slides her hands down his front, fingers mapping out all his familiar sharp angles. One strays between his legs, her palm setting lightly enough to tease. ]
[ she is more than welcome to curse him however she wants. she can hiss, she can shove him away, she can tell him all the ways she wants to pull him apart. he would let her. he would love for her to.
inej’s hand presses to his chest, and kaz falls back with it. watching, as much as he can from this angle. and then as she climbs back across his lap and he resettles, just enough to shift the pressure off his bad leg, and he can feel her through the linen of his pants. ]
Impatient? [ he says with a chuckle, maybe a bit too confident, as his hands settle back on her waist. her palm settles teasingly against him, and kaz’s hips jerk towards her. ]
[ He looks good like this, she thinks, all laid out before her. All eager and willing to have her so close; each time she's reminded of how far they've come. And so many times she feels the burn of impatience, the months away at sea catching up all at once.
His hands settle on her waist and she presses her palm down gently when his hips arch up, giving him what he wants. Well, for now. Though she can't deny feeling him hardening under her hand is a one sided pleasure. She moves said hand, shifting up to settle across his hips, making it easier for her to lean down to kiss his neck. ]
A little. [ Inej murmurs it, amused, against the hollow of his throat. She kisses a line down, soft presses of her mouth to his chest. With a slow roll of her hips, she mimics his earlier motion, letting out a satisfied sound. ]
[ that is a big part of it, isn't it. the time spent waiting to get here. the time spent before, where the briefest thought of having inej like this, of knowing that in the following moments he will be that much closer to her, would have had him retching. not because of inej, some part of him has always wanted her, but in general. a time where the thought of skin on skin, of anyone touching him had been a pressure he couldn't stand.
now, he can't get enough of it. now, he spends each moment he's forced to spend away from her, thinking of just this. he loves the warmth in how his hands settle on her lips, adores the simple weight of her over him, of her palm pressing down. kaz hisses, but it's through a small grin, as he leans his head back and lets her have free reign of his neck. he meets the slow roll of her hips, pushing them both up off the bed if only for the friction.
kaz needs more than this, they both know that, but he also knows how much inej enjoys slowly pulling that out of him. so instead of saying it, kaz instead lets go with one of his hands too, reaching down to run across her, putting his fingers to use. ]
[ His grin, while near cheeky, is good to see. She's gotten used to his reactions, cataloguing all the little things that tell her when he's okay or when he's shaken, when he needs space. Right now, he's open and wanting, that knife sharp crook of his mouth telling her to keep going. She drags her nails down his chest, stopping to tweak both of his nipples, rolling her thumbs across them. It's a brief touch, one that continues down again, following the indents of his ribs and the dip of his stomach.
Of course, he distracts her with his own touch, clever fingers running across her skin. Inej sways towards the contact, eager for more. Her hips shift against him again, the jut of his erection pressing between her legs enough to be a tease. She shifts her weight enough to undo the front of his pants, tugging the waistband down his hips. ]
[ then she should be able to tell that tonight will be a good night. inej is right, to always be looking out for him. bad days sneak up from the shadows of the slat when he least expects it, and the dirtyhands rumors will start up once more. but they are few and far between, and right now, in this room, the last thing he's worrying about is that.
instead, he wants quite the opposite. wants inej's hands across his chest, pulling a hiss from him as his back arches, up into her nails, her fingers on his chest. everywhere she touches is fire, a good fire, one he chases after where he can. ]
Inej... [ his voice is low, gravelly, heavy with want and impatient. with a dangerous crick of a tone. don't keep me waiting. she'll know he doesn't mean anything by it, it's been far too long since kaz any authority of inej, she pulls down the waistband of his pants and he lets out a laugh.
there's just enough time for him to reach up and press a palm to her, running his fingers between her legs. to lean forward and press his lips to her shoulder. he just wants to feel her, at this point, any way he can. ]
[ Maybe once before, she would've felt the full impact of his impatience. She would have done something about it, their footing still so unsure in those early days. But now she simply smiles at the edge of his tone, knowing exactly what it means. Authoritative without the authority– if she didn't know better, she'd say it was petulant.
Except it cracks in the next moment, his raspy laugh filling the space between them. The sound warms her from the inside out, knowing she's one of the few who's heard it, genuinely. And well, maybe his touch helps, clever fingers finding their way between her legs, mouth to her shoulder. She hums at both, though her hips push down just a bit, savoring the pressure.
Too bad she isn't one to get distracted from her goals, no matter how much she wants something in the moment. Though she makes it a brief departure as she tugs his pants down and off, wanting just as much as him to touch. When she resettles, she pulls him in for a deeper kiss, both of her palms pressed flat against his chest. ]
Can I help you? [ The words are murmured against his lips, the light and teasing tone discolored by how obvious her want is. ]
[ petulant. inej is the only person in all of ketterdam who would dare to think as much. the only person who would be safe enough to do so. and she knows it, which is half the reason why. inej moves under his hands, pressing more firmly into his palm, and he presses back to her in kind.
inej is the stronger person here (in more ways than one) when she pulls them apart. kaz almost tries to follow her when she goes, but in realizing moments later where and why she moves, Kaz falls back again to lift his hips, to help get the pants off and removed. it's a little rushed, a little inelegant (there's only so much he can do, even when he leg feels alright), but they are still young. still stumbling through whatever this is supposed to be.
inej resettles and Kaz sits back up to meet her, meeting her push for push on the kiss, his hands back to her waist, reaching around her lower back to pull her closer. the words pull his attention from the more primal (heat, her, close, now) back to the higher functioning, and Kaz grins back against her lips. ]
I don't think I need to answer that.
[ because in the end, kaz brekker will always be a little shit. ]
[ His hands settle back on her waist and she feels a thrill, enjoying the weight of them. The wanted possessiveness. It's taken her a while to get used to that particular touch, having been handled in the Menagerie so often. But now she loves it, loves him. Knows if she asked, he'd take his hands away immediately. Knows he's always looking out for her, can see it now in the warm coffee of his gaze and his grin.
She huffs a laugh, smiling against his mouth. ]
No, I guess not. [ Inej presses another kiss to his lips and then another, each one stoking the heat under her skin. And then she's settling her center right against his cock, pushing her hips down. Her pulse skips and she lets out a shaky breath across his neck, repeating the motion and feeling a sticky rush dampen her underwear enough to make the cloth flimsy. ]
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Certainly, there's plenty to do. The wicked never rest and so her days are filled with following the miserable trails that the slaver ships leave behind. This time, she stalks two across the open ocean; The Ribald and Snake Eyes. Neither make it to their ports with their crew intact. She spends the rest of the time between looking for lost families, restoring children and teens to their homes or at the very least, someplace they can start over.
A few of the truly lost end up staying with her for the journey back to Ketterdam, intent on starting over. She makes them no promises, because even with Kaz's leverage—which she intends to use—the Barrel is not a place of safety. Inej looks at each of them hard in the eye as she gives them these facts, the way so many can end up with a slit throat in a gutter, and each of her five orphans stare back with their chins up.
They'll make it, she thinks.
When her ship finally docks, she can feel tension starting to slough off, as if the ocean is a heavy cloak she wears. Someone has to do her work, but she's beginning to understand how royalty could feel, how the weight of a crown bears down. She places Specht in charge and has Kumir—a recent addition—oversee the orphans and making sure they get a good start. Later, she'll make sure they're specifically placed.
But for now, she has someone to see. It only takes her a few minutes to get her land legs back and once she does, she doesn't waste time with the streets. The rooftops are freedom here, above all the muck of the streets, away from prying hands and peering eyes. Her feet remember the path to the Slat with ease and soon enough, she's picking the lock to a particular attic window, ducking in and dropping from the sill. ]
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kaz has the slay to oversee, the dregs to watch over. stock and leverage and pieces of the city either fall in or out of place and he is there to correct them. it’s not a matter of if the other gangs will start acting up, but when. how. and how can he get ahead of them. because that’s what it comes down to at the end of the day - staying ahead. always ahead. and it happens to be what he’s best at.
the dregs are doing well, the crow club is doing well. he lies awake at night thinking not about what he needs to do but what he needs to keep in place. it’s a change from the life he’s grown used to, surviving in the barrel, but it’s a life he can get used to. has.
when the city already assumes you’re a monster, you don’t need to spend your time doing every monstrous thing.
and kaz’s reputation - the dregs’ reputation - has reached all walks of the city. it hasn’t made life easy, per day, but easier. different. less unwieldy.
he loses track of how long it’s been since inej’s ship had last found its way to third harbor, the last time he had a new collection of upstarts to place, to watch over, to be responsible for. he knows inej doesn’t expect him to give them the city, but he can’t help but push them along. provide protection, when he can. push a few favors, if he must. he has the clout and power to use, and if they are one of the few connections to inej he has while she’s off at sea, well. he’ll take them.
it’s late in the day by the time kaz brekker turns in, thinking of a bath and his bed as he starts up the stairs. and that is still what’s on his mind when he slides his key in the lock - because while his office may be downstairs, now, he would never give up this attic space, the window ledge, the view. he doesn’t work up here like he used to, maybe, but this space is still his. even if someone else is inside by the time the key turns and the door swings open. even if there is another body in the room when he steps inside, closes the door behind him, and turns back to the room.
inej was always the only one he couldn’t sense. couldn’t hear. couldn’t know was coming from a mile away. ]
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But she knows he won’t. The attic is his space, the furthest point away from the noise and crowd of the first floor. Here, there aren’t too many bodies in close quarters. Nowadays, it’s only him without her ghosting his steps.
For a short while, she’ll do that again, this time because she misses it. Misses the way they move around each other in an easy flow, a current that seems like they’ve known the other longer than they have. Most of all, though, she just misses him.
He doesn’t immediately notice her when he steps in, his expression filled with pre-occupation. It’s not a scheme, that much she can tell, but there’s a plan. Something he’s considering; it’s in the divot between his brows. ]
I see I beat your runner here. [ Of course she did, the rooftops have always been the fastest route back. ]
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[ he notices the second she speaks - another space, a body, her. it’s barely a moment’s pause, but he’s sure she notices, the half second of tension before the release.
inej is the only other person who could come looking for him here, the only person who would be able to get in. a part of him is proud for what he was able to teach her, but a larger, louder part knows it’s just her. given the time and the determination, inej could get anything she wanted.
the door closes behind him with a solid, definitely click and kaz looks up, seeing inej perched across the room, and actually allows himself a smile. small, perhaps a bit weighted, but genuine. rare. the kind of smile he reserves for inej and inej alone. ]
Good to know the sea hasn’t slowed you down.
[ he’ll ask after his runner, later. how much slower they were. if they’d be doing their job. for now, every inch of kaz screams at inej’s very presence in the room. the fact that she’s here at all, but here looking like that. kaz meets her eyes but then let’s himself look at the rest of her - taking only a second, but enough time to notice the differences. the new clothes, the length of her hair, any visible scars. it’s still inej - stunning, beautiful, maddening inej - but he checks in all the same.
only after that is done does he continue into the room. does he step closer to her, but towards his desk, setting the cane to lean against it and to reach for his gloves. comfortable, familiar, still part of his routine - almost in spite of the way every single nerve of his screams about inej’s presence, that she’s here. finally here. back again. ]
And that you haven’t forgotten your way to the slat.
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Kaz doesn’t disappoint, his gaze first sweeping over her as eagerly as hers does to him. Cataloguing the changes, how she’s pretty sure that’s a new jacket, a little gauntness to his face that says he hasn’t been sleeping well lately. Inej wants nothing more than to put a hand on his cheek and tell him to rest, but she can be patient. ]
Specht complains I spend too much time in the ropes. [ So no, her climbing hasn’t had a chance to rust. It’s a thrill, to balance along the mast beams and watch the sea whip by; perhaps too much of one for her trusty first mate, who always looks a little green around the gills by the time she climbs back down. ]
You’d have to move the entire building before I forget.
OH NO THE HTML ON THAT LAST TAG rip
even still, kaz takes his time. he peels the gloves off easily, slipping them over his hands and laying the across the top of the desk. then comes his jacket, sliding down off his shoulders easily.
this isn't the first time inej has watched kaz strip down in his office, and he doesn't suppose it will be the last either.
still, as he sets the coat down on the desk, he finally turns to face her, taking slow steps towards her as he works the buttons of his sleeves undone. he came up to his room to get comfortable, after all. why keep on his armor? ]
And I expect you'd find me even then. [ he says it with a sly smile, knowing and joking and carefully crafted all at once. because while he's gotten better at letting himself simply be seen by inej, he is still kaz brekker, all carefully crafted walls and all.
by the time he's reached her, his sleeves have been rolled up to his elbows, his dark woven vest still buttoned and his dark tie still tied. and with a few more steps, he makes it to her, setting his hands on the windowsill on either side of her. ]
Welcome back to the Barrel, Wraith.
It happens to the best of us OTL
Trust Kaz to boil undressing down to efficiency.
Now there’s definitely an undertone, a tension that layers between them as he carefully rolls up his sleeves and effectively corners her against the sill. She tilts her chin up to meet his gaze, a smile barely curving her mouth up. Reaching up, she gently musses his slicked back hair, smile widening when it starts to fall across his forehead. The lack of severity takes years off his face and she likes how it’s borderline rakish. ]
Is that all the greeting I get, Kaz Brekker?
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when she speaks, kaz opens his eyes to see her again, hungry. bright. physically there and not just another ones of his dreams. ]
Do you want something more? Name your price.
[ kaz wants to be closer. wants to touch her. wants to feel her. but he won't let himself be weak enough to act on that mere moments after she's arrived back in the slat. so instead he lifts his brows, looks up to meet her eyes, waiting for her answer.
name your price. because he'll pay it. anything for her. ]
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Those moments are fewer and farther between, but they’re still there.
Just, perhaps, not right now. Not with how he’s looking at her with that darkened gaze, the brown of his eyes warm. It’s a look only she’s privy to and it buoys her whole mood. ]
I’ll take a kiss to start. [ There’s a simmer of promise of something more, underneath that. She slides a hand to his tie, as if tugging him down to meet her. And maybe it doubles as a motion to loosen it, to see him further relaxed. ]
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A modest price. [ because he sees the promise of something more, under her words. the promise of something else that neither he nor she would admit to wanting.
he wants her, but that's no surprise to either of them, considering the changes he's made. the price he's paid to be here. no longer does his skin crawl, feeling her fingers slide over his scalp. no tension in his frame - if anything, less tension that before - the closer she comes to him. he's worked hard and continued to work hard to get here, but even through it all, inej is really the only exception.
kaz grins at her, then leans in to close the distance, kissing her at first with very little expectation behind it. soft, modest you might say, in how their lips brush together. but even still, he feels like a piece of himself settles back into place, knowing it's her. knowing that she's here.
his hands don't lift from the windowsill as they kiss. and when he pulls away, it's with a quick intake of breath. because she's always been the only one who could steal anything from kaz. anything at all. ] To start.
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Not that she’ll say no if he decides to give any of those particular feelings a voice. He has, here and there, each admittance a gift from someone like Kaz Brekker, who has been so buttoned up for the entire time she’s known him. The Barrel isn’t a kind place, it’s difficult to shed habits which expose their soft sides.
Here though, she can revel in the actionable. How he leans in without hesitation, mouth pressing gently to hers, just barely a brush. Her heartbeat ticks up a notch, the flutter that insists on more. Inej meets the kiss, leans in a bit, fingers curling tighter on his tie, something to ground her. When he pulls away, she lets him with a tinge of regret. ]
Passable. [ She teases, though she wedges a finger into the loop of his tie, pulling carefully to unravel it. The cloth slides down itself, leaving it hanging– only his collar holding it in place. ] Aren’t you going to relax?
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I am relaxed. [ kaz counters, letting his eyes drift down inej's neck, to the collar of her shirt. because in most ways that people know him, he is. his jacket is tossed unceremoniously, his gloves left behind. with his tie undone, it's the least amount of clothing most have ever seen him stripped down to, short those of the crew he'd taken to the ice court a few years prior. but that's the point, isn't it? that inej is the only one who can take off his layers, one piece at a time.
he wants her, and it's a feeling he's become more comfortable with over the years. the yearning, the ache, the distinct force that pulls him towards inej even before he was at a place where he could do this. this, in this instance, being kaz as he leans forward just a bit more, pressing a kiss to the skin under inej's ear, and then her neck. just as soft, just as feather-light, easing into this despite how much his body screams at him to move. ]
Are you going to relax?
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Three months felt too long, so many of those nights ending up with her turning over for someone who wasn't there. It's manifested as a physical ache, especially now that they're so close together. She leans into the soft kiss, tilts her head just a bit to the side so the angle is easier. Blindly, she feels out the buttons on his vest and undoes them, grabbing ahold of the two sides and tugging him closer. ]
Too wound up, you're going to have to help.
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inej reaches up and deftly undoes each of his buttons, gripping the fabric of his vest and pulling him closer. he lets her, kaz will always let her now that they've come this far, and he lifts one of his hands from the sill to press across the flat of her back. ]
Wound up from what? [ the question is half curiosity (if she really did run into any trouble on her journeys) and half keeping up the pretense of conversation. of making it seem that he's not just some animal, ready to jump inej the second he's close enough to feel her (no matter how much truth that may hold). with a small step, he settles up against her, both of his hands moving to work at the ties at her back, undressing her with thin, thieves fingers, quick and efficient in their use.
kaz leans back though not away from her, just enough to catch her eyes - confirming her intent, but also showing his own, before he leans and catches her lips again, this kiss much more firm than the one before. more hungry, more desperate, bits and pieces of himself peeking out from the layers he closes himself in during their time apart. ]
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He's neither of those things currently, especially not with how he puts a warm and possessive hand on her back. ]
Long journey. [ She starts, simple enough, while she lets him undo the more complicated laces on her vest. His weight carefully balances against her and she feels a familiar urge to push him onto the bed. ] I had too much time to think about you these last few weeks.
[ After she and Specht agreed it was about time to head towards Kerch. They'd been getting low on supplies and had gained more than a few more mouths to feed. Now that she's here, all those lonely days are floating to the surface. She shrugs off the vest and meets his gaze, her own desire a mirror to his. They're both holding back, just enough. It won't hold for much longer, she thinks, as she returns the kiss, both of her hands dragging down his front. ]
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but whatever meaning might be under those words is lost the second he is kissing her again, his fingers working off the laces on the back of her vest and pulling loose the tunic and undershirt. just enough that his fingers can slide across the skin at her lower back - possessive, hungry, desperate all over again. the feeling of her skin against his own is electric, a heat moving up his arms and into his chest, and it has him leaning into her more fully as he pulls her body tighter to his own.
his resistance is crumbling, he can feel it falling away like melting ice, but the bed is across the room and that - at this moment - is just too far away. so instead he simply presses more tightly against her, rolling his hips to hers. ]
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Certainly, it has her soaking up the attention when he kisses her again, his hands pulling her shirt out from where it's been tucked and skimming his fingers across her skin. A noise of appreciation is muffled against his mouth and when he finally rolls his hips to hers, there's a low throbbing heat in her stomach.
Her own fingers slide to find the buttons on his shirt, undoing them and eagerly yanking the cloth up, one palm laying flat on his chest. She pulls away from the kiss long enough to give him a gentle nudge with said hand. ]
Bed, now. [ Her patience has frayed; no longer interested in pretending she can wait. ]
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she pushes him away and he tugs on her lips when they separate, not quite ready to lose this touch. to let this stop. her palm is flat against his chest and she can probably feel the speed his heart is moving, the erratic thumping against his ribcage.
bed, now she says, and there’s a fire under his skin. an electric current that courses out to every inch of him. he leans back, ignoring how the shifting weight makes his leg ache, and let’s out a breath - a sigh, not of relief but of acceptance. ]
You’ve grown impatient. [ it’s teasing, of course, his voice a low gravel as he slides his open vest and shirt off his shoulders and let’s them crumple to the floor, before reaching back towards her to grab at her waist, pulling her away from the windowsill and with him across the room. ]
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My hand and a pillow are poor replacements. [ Yes that means exactly what you think, Kaz. She only pauses her steps to pull her top off, dropping the garment on the floor to join his. A flick of her wrist and the binder she wears is undone, falling to her feet and leaving her just as bare as he is on top. Once she kicks her shoes off, she sidles in closer again, smoothing her hands down his sides greedily. Leaning up, she kisses his neck briefly, pulling away with a scrape of teeth. ]
If you say you aren't just the same, I'm calling you a liar.
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But I am a liar. And a thief. [ kaz's brow arches, still a bit playful in his good mood, as he reaches and pulls her closer to him, between his knees. he let's himself have another moment to take her in, the naked expanse of her before him, the soft warmth of her skin under his hands. there's still an inch to the back of his brain, then, a curling of emotion - but that is now want, hunger, desire. not the nauseating mixture of self-disgust he carried with him for years.
he presses a kiss to her collar bone, then another below, his hands running up her thighs. ] What did you think about, with your hand and a pillow? [ he looks up at her through dark lashes, setting another kiss below her collarbone and above her heart, then a third further down her chest. ]
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With that in mind, she steps between his legs without a second thought, liking the change of height. It's easier to study his face like this, catalogue the difference in the arch of his brow, how his eyes have gone dark—but not bitter. She makes a pleased little noise when he slides his hands up her legs, a shiver running its way up her spine.
Combing her fingers through his hair, she gently scratches down the back of his neck, nails pressing in just enough to leave quick fading depressions as she gets to his shoulders. Later, she thinks she'll leave a mark, something only she'll see. ]
I wanted to sit across your hips and have you take me. Or to wake you with my hand around your cock. [ That was the least of it. Her expression softens and she traces a finger along his collarbone. ] Mostly, how much I wanted to hold you.
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kaz wants her to mark him, but that isn't abnormal. especially with her schedule, he likes the reminders she did come back - whether for him, or the city, or anything else. ]
That could be arranged. [ a smirk, a look up through his eyelashes. catching his eyes, before kissing her chest again, and then down again, before wrapping around his mouth around the peak of her breast. ]
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Now though, she feels nothing but a thrill when Kaz's fingers tighten on her thighs. It's not enough to bruise, not yet, but the pressure is welcome. She's about to ask him to move them higher, to the vee of her legs, panties starting to go damp from so little touch after so long. He ducks his head though, all mischief when his mouth closes on her chest, and she forgets any words she'd been about to say. ]
Good boy. [ Is what comes out instead, syllables mixed in with a gasp. One hand settles at the back of his neck, as if to keep him there. The other drops down, nails gently scraping down his chest. ]
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before, there would have been nothing kaz could have given her in this moment. simply being near her had driven him insane, and now he honestly, truly, can't get enough of her.
he swirls his tongue around her, kissing and sucking at the peak he has in his mouth. at the good boy, kaz actually feels something like electricity shoot down his spine, just enough to have him dig his nails into the skin of her thigh. not too hard, not enough to mark, but to show intent. intent for something more. ]
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While enjoyable, it's not strictly fair. She wants more and she thinks the grip on her thighs tells the same story. The hand on his chest pushes again this time, aiming to get him back on the bed. She'll follow him onto it after she undoes her pants and pulls them down, haphazardly kicking them onto the floor. Clad only in her underwear, she settles across his lap, letting her warmth bleed through his trousers.
Leaning forward, she presses an affectionate kiss to his cheek. ]
Moving too slow. [ She says as she slides her hands down his front, fingers mapping out all his familiar sharp angles. One strays between his legs, her palm setting lightly enough to tease. ]
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inej’s hand presses to his chest, and kaz falls back with it. watching, as much as he can from this angle. and then as she climbs back across his lap and he resettles, just enough to shift the pressure off his bad leg, and he can feel her through the linen of his pants. ]
Impatient? [ he says with a chuckle, maybe a bit too confident, as his hands settle back on her waist. her palm settles teasingly against him, and kaz’s hips jerk towards her. ]
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His hands settle on her waist and she presses her palm down gently when his hips arch up, giving him what he wants. Well, for now. Though she can't deny feeling him hardening under her hand is a one sided pleasure. She moves said hand, shifting up to settle across his hips, making it easier for her to lean down to kiss his neck. ]
A little. [ Inej murmurs it, amused, against the hollow of his throat. She kisses a line down, soft presses of her mouth to his chest. With a slow roll of her hips, she mimics his earlier motion, letting out a satisfied sound. ]
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now, he can't get enough of it. now, he spends each moment he's forced to spend away from her, thinking of just this. he loves the warmth in how his hands settle on her lips, adores the simple weight of her over him, of her palm pressing down. kaz hisses, but it's through a small grin, as he leans his head back and lets her have free reign of his neck. he meets the slow roll of her hips, pushing them both up off the bed if only for the friction.
kaz needs more than this, they both know that, but he also knows how much inej enjoys slowly pulling that out of him. so instead of saying it, kaz instead lets go with one of his hands too, reaching down to run across her, putting his fingers to use. ]
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Of course, he distracts her with his own touch, clever fingers running across her skin. Inej sways towards the contact, eager for more. Her hips shift against him again, the jut of his erection pressing between her legs enough to be a tease. She shifts her weight enough to undo the front of his pants, tugging the waistband down his hips. ]
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instead, he wants quite the opposite. wants inej's hands across his chest, pulling a hiss from him as his back arches, up into her nails, her fingers on his chest. everywhere she touches is fire, a good fire, one he chases after where he can. ]
Inej... [ his voice is low, gravelly, heavy with want and impatient. with a dangerous crick of a tone. don't keep me waiting. she'll know he doesn't mean anything by it, it's been far too long since kaz any authority of inej, she pulls down the waistband of his pants and he lets out a laugh.
there's just enough time for him to reach up and press a palm to her, running his fingers between her legs. to lean forward and press his lips to her shoulder. he just wants to feel her, at this point, any way he can. ]
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Except it cracks in the next moment, his raspy laugh filling the space between them. The sound warms her from the inside out, knowing she's one of the few who's heard it, genuinely. And well, maybe his touch helps, clever fingers finding their way between her legs, mouth to her shoulder. She hums at both, though her hips push down just a bit, savoring the pressure.
Too bad she isn't one to get distracted from her goals, no matter how much she wants something in the moment. Though she makes it a brief departure as she tugs his pants down and off, wanting just as much as him to touch. When she resettles, she pulls him in for a deeper kiss, both of her palms pressed flat against his chest. ]
Can I help you? [ The words are murmured against his lips, the light and teasing tone discolored by how obvious her want is. ]
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inej is the stronger person here (in more ways than one) when she pulls them apart. kaz almost tries to follow her when she goes, but in realizing moments later where and why she moves, Kaz falls back again to lift his hips, to help get the pants off and removed. it's a little rushed, a little inelegant (there's only so much he can do, even when he leg feels alright), but they are still young. still stumbling through whatever this is supposed to be.
inej resettles and Kaz sits back up to meet her, meeting her push for push on the kiss, his hands back to her waist, reaching around her lower back to pull her closer. the words pull his attention from the more primal (heat, her, close, now) back to the higher functioning, and Kaz grins back against her lips. ]
I don't think I need to answer that.
[ because in the end, kaz brekker will always be a little shit. ]
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She huffs a laugh, smiling against his mouth. ]
No, I guess not. [ Inej presses another kiss to his lips and then another, each one stoking the heat under her skin. And then she's settling her center right against his cock, pushing her hips down. Her pulse skips and she lets out a shaky breath across his neck, repeating the motion and feeling a sticky rush dampen her underwear enough to make the cloth flimsy. ]